Friday, June 25, 2010

Farting around on a Friday

Laundry detergent. It's my cue to start looking through the coupons. Since I file three different laundry-related items in the same file, I dole them out carefully, pocketing the ones that have expired. Cheer. I hand that one to him. Tide. Hmmm, here's Gain. Oh! And Wisk. Fab. Purex. Arm & Hammer. All. That's a really good coupon.

*sigh* Why don't you just hand them to me all at once? I start to explain, but when I look up, he's already halfway down the aisle. I go wheeling after him, trying to dodge all the other carts. On the way, I see a couple of interesting sights. What I am supposed to be looking for? Oh, wow, Ekim, did you see those HUGE marshmallows? He looks dubious. How big were they? Um, really big. BIG. And some of them were pink.

Also, there are people singing, laughing, and making all manner of strange sounds in the next aisle. I wanted to stare at them so bad, but--time's a'wastin', we gotsta keep moving. It's fascinating, really, to think of people having so much fun at the grocery store. It's like being in Fort Lauderdale, at the Publix, where there are always some rather intoxicated tourists, or not-tourists, buying another sixpack of beer. Or a contact case that she doesn't need because it's already packed, except she's too tipsy to find it. And is so sure that it hasn't been packed. She's the one who cannot seem to navigate the store or read anything without holding it thisclose to her face. Hey, but it's cool, it's cool, she's buying her 57th contact case, to be added to the shoebox full of them she has at home. What fun!



Actually, I think that some more interesting signage could do a lot for the grocery shopping experience.
(Large hass avocados. See, with just a little tweaking, we can all have so much fun)


Now, this one's food for thought. I have no -- idea.

5 comments:

Doug said...

Just glad it got its own aisle.

TLP said...

Bwwwaaaaah! Fuck goods! It doesn't look like condoms...so...what can it be. Maybe it's chocolate. Chocolate is fuckin' good.

I don't like to grocery shop. Even worse: I hate putting the groceries away. I don't like shopping alone, but I don't like shopping with your father even more. It's not a family activity.

Logophile said...

I agree with TLP but my method is to just send my husband.
Interesting signage would make for a better experience, I agree. Have you seen those videos of Weird Al Yankovic fixing punctuation errors on signs? I'd love to go on a shopping trip and do THAT.

I have no problem with there being fucking goods but a whole aisle of them?
How many varieties of condoms do they make??

Ariel the Thief said...

Yellow curved fruits, LOL!!! Shopping can be stressing huh?

Nessa said...

That certainly would make shopping more interesting for me.