Sunday, February 28, 2010

Being the Last of February

Scout comes in groggy, tired, as she has every right to be; she works the latest shift on weekdays, she's there almost every weekend, she's taking four classes, and she's a tiny figure lugging a big metal drawer, and hesitating. I don't know where I'm supposed to set up...I shrug, and know that she wants to be in the quieter back, in the drive-thru. You can set up back there (with Bluff), I'll be fine. Samiam will be in soon, anyway. And then I realize, the brightest and most mature teenager in the place has sort of sought my--permission. Meanwhile, Bluff, who started work earliest, set up in the 'back' seat of the drive-thru, so that whoever came next would be sitting in the hotter seat. Scout has an admirable talent for being likable, and seems to be able to get more cooperation out of Bluff than anyone else. It's hard to believe that these two are the same age.



This Saturday morning is more pleasant than most; no one was rude, and some people were downright entertaining. One particular gentleman who I knew for his habit of coming through the drive-thru for change came into the lobby, instead, and embarked on a very strange line of conversation. He showed me the huge bandage on his thumb, telling me about the ganglion cyst he had removed, explaining why he needed his paperwork filled out for him, then asked me how long I'd been married. When I told him 21 years, he replied, Yeah, I thought you looked like you'd been married for awhile. I'm going to take that in the best possible way. Forty-three years! He exclaimed. I've been married for forty-three years, and after forty-three years, you think you know someone. He points to the large bills he's just given me to deposit, and states, she's a gambler! She went down to PN and lost two thousand dollars! Man, I used to keep money in a safe, but not now. I hauled her in front of the gaming commission and had her banned, so she'll be arrested next time she shows up. And she's in counseling....Gadzooks, I didn't know how to react to all this stuff. Good luck?



It's both cold and bright outside this morning, and one woman informs me that she was always hot during menopause, but now she's freezing, again. Another tells me of the long and winding road she traveled to get her job at the local library, and then Samiam arrives. His mother has dropped him off today, and there is certainly a story behind that, but darned if I will ever understand it. He was driving in the--woods? last night, and somehow his light is now missing, and his mirror is missing, and something else is missing (I couldn't keep up), and his alignment is so off that he has to cock the steering wheel to drive. Okay, I have experience with that, after what I did to my little red buddy, but what I don't understand was the WOODS part. Well, you see, my friend lives way out...yadayada...and then I needed to make a three-point turn....in the woods, right. It was awful! Being suck like that.



And then Bluff is talking about the fitness program she's started, she's paying $190 a month for a personal trainer and a health spa and her expert is telling her that cardio is a waste of time. It does nothing for you--some people get on a treadmill and spend 45 minutes there, but they are nuts. Unless you have a lot of weight to lose, it's a waste of your time. What you need is weight training and the right diet. I am biting my tongue in half. Billy Crystal's comedic character is real, now; it really is better to look good than to feel good.



As for me, I'm on my twentieth day of lexapro, and I am feeling better. It ended the meaningless crying jags immediately and does take the sharp edges off all the little things that were ganging up on me. Also, I never realized how nervous I always was--I don't think of myself as someone who experiences high anxiety, but I do. For instance, there is so much construction in this area that a routine drive to the nearby city and back has my fine hairs standing up because of the cattle shoots. Perhaps the medication will make me a better passenger? It would make Ekim happy if I'd stop covering my eyes and assuming the fetal position.






Omigosh! Tomorrow is March. ...for such a beastly month as February, twenty-eight days as a rule are plenty...

8 comments:

Doug said...

That was a great post. I think introverts are very hard to read in terms of anxiety. I am now missing two molars on the right lower jaw because I grind my teeth to dust and people ask me how I manage to always stay so calm. I'm running out of empty land to bury them all.

I think we don't self-diagnose well either.

TLP said...

Wonderful post. You should write for a living.

Good drugs are the answer to life. I know.

TLP said...

Perfect pix with the kitty. That's how I'd be if I ever let your father drive me anywhere.

Tom & Icy said...

That sure was a nice post. But talking about how long you were married reminded me that today (Sunday) was my 35th anniversary and neither my wife or I realized it.

actonbell said...

Doug-that's a very insightful comment, about introverts appearing to be such calm, quiet people. I suppose quiet and calm go together in people's minds. That's worrisome, about your grinding, hope you find some relief. Mike used to bite his nails down to the nib, but did quit. Now he brushes his teeth so hard that he's had to have restorative work done...

Thanks, Mom. I'd probably scare you, too:)

Tom--thank you, and happy late anniversary:)

Nessa said...

This was a great post. Interesting and entertaining. Looking calm and being calm a two very different things. Still waters run deep and all.

RnPB: Ch 013 - Clean Up

Bone said...

It would make Ekim happy if I'd stop covering my eyes and assuming the fetal position.

LOL That's better than complaining or unsolicited driving advice :)

That was quite the entertaining day/post. The gambling story was great.

Jocelyn said...

I'm glad some of the sharp edges are just that much softer now--especially with anxiety.

The rundown of people here was amazing...I've heard trainers push "no cardio," too, and I don't get it. Why not lift weights AND do cardio?