Tuesday, July 21, 2009

humdrum heyday

Don't you just love it when people who have absolutely nothing to say blog anyway? I know! It's fascinating, the way some people waste precious time.

Hi. My name is Actonbell, and I am a timewaster. This is my 748th time here, and I've been a timewaster all my life. My hunger for downtime is insatiable. I've been known to sit still, almost paralyzed with enertia, for hours on end. Why, even when I do get myself out running, all I do is daydream. My mind wanders as I read even the most intriguing book.

It's worse lately, for some reason. There is nothing wrong with me. Why can’t I get out of bed? Why can’t I be elated to get out of bed? Why can’t I be elated and grateful and totally looking forward to getting out of bed and going for a run? If my health were suddenly taken away, I'd certainly miss all the mornings I didn't get up and make something of the day.

I need a new drug. Well, or something to look forward to, even if it's just watching all the Alfred Hitchcock movies, anything, the sillier the better. When my mother called and invited me out to see the latest Harry Potter movie, I felt like jumping for joy. YAY! Woohoo! I was happier over that prospect than I'd felt for months.

Maybe something is wrong with me.

It was a slow day at work, and I sat there, gazing out the window (I work in a fishbowl), watching all this--fluff--go by. I dreamily remarked that it looked like all the Whovilles were on the move, and one of my super-young coworkers had no idea what I was talking about, never heard of Horton. Which reminds me, I won a trivia contest at work (because I'm older), and I won a $15 gift certificate from Borders. Hey, but ya know what? I don't even know what I wanna get.

There's definitely something wrong with me, but--my cat's worse; Serena's been hangin' out in her carrier. Her carrier, that box that always meant, "I'm putting you in the car so we can go to the vet." That carrier. For no reason at all. She's got the run of the house again, plenty of comfy spots to sleep, it's not even raining out there, but there she is. Whatever.

*Yawn* Had enough? Me, too. Good night.


TLP said...

Nope. I never get enough of you!

Sister AP3 is coming on Sunday and will be here all week. Good times.

I daydream all the time. In fact, when I walk (rarely) on the treadmill, I pick my daydream in advance. It's a continuing story, but I have to decide where I left off so I know where to start up again.

Jocelyn said...

There is such resonance between our current posts, eh?

Do you think to yourself it might be a lowgrade depression...or that it's a middle age thing...or that there's an easy, pragmatic answer, like setting a clear, strong goal and, errrrrrrrrrrr, somehow motivating towards it?

I know I play around with all possibilities, as I try to figure out my own head.


Tom & Icy said...

When things are like that, when I feel like that, it seems what they call 'Kafkaesque', or like the writings of Kafka: things seeming surreal and something bad is about to happen.

Marti said...

Hi sugar! I daydream of the days when I could visit all my blog buddies on a regular basis. Now I wrangle my Parkinson's afflicted mother-in-law and my stroke-stricken husband around to doctors and medical testing facilities.

Sorry you are feeling so blah lately. Sending happy vibes your way!

Christine said...

It may just be the heat and a little dehydration. Even if your house has AC going out and in and driving in a hot car until it cools down takes a toll. Also might be the same for kitty..or she is just feeding off of your mood.

If you don't already do so, I would drink five HUGE glasses of ICE water a day for a couple of days. On occasion, things are as easy as that.

Sorry you're feeling punky.

Doug said...

A blog is a community of co-time wasters so, in a sense, we're building a whole village this way.

Did you try crack?

Bone said...

Sometimes the prospect of an afternoon nap is the only thing getting me out of bed in the morning :)

I hope you feel un-blah soon.

Sean P. Farley said...

OH my god, I'm right there with you. I used to wake up by 7 in the morning, now it's 9. Being unemployed doesn't help. There's no energy. I'm at the computer with my coffee by 9:30 and the next thing I know it's noon and I've done nothing but surf the internet. Dang, there was a 3 month period last year when we had no internet and, by the 3rd month it was wonderful. I read, wrote, read some more. Now it's all internet. Sigh. What's worse is that it's now midnight and i should be sleeping.