Saturday, February 09, 2008

Countdown

Monday, February 4:

It's been awhile since I've had to study so much.

somniloquy (som-NIL-uh-kwee) noun

The act or habit of talking while asleep.
It's intense and was sort of intimidating, at first. I can picture myself, scheduled to leave at 6pm, but not being able to settle my drawer until 9pm. It's a little nightmare of mine. And then the two tests/quizzes. Eek, it would be embarrassing to have to take them over. They'd probably tell your supervisor how you function during training, too.

After studying quite a bit, I got a 99% on that first quiz. We were required to get at least 80%, and those who didn't had to come in an hour earlier this morning. That would suck. Some of these people have to travel quite a distance to the training center. And I gather at least four people fell into the take-the-test-over category, and there are only ten left in the class. (We've lost two, no one knows why. They both seemed very interested, too.)

There are some alarmingly young people in training with me. One of them, Beamer, is a very sweet young woman who is always lost, and I do mean completely lost. Actually, so is Lily. She's right out of high school. Then there's Wilma, who I find hilarious, except she's not trying to be. She's good natured about it, though. Last Friday, we were all encouraged to wear football jerseys, which she did, and when a company photographer came in to take our group picture, Wilma lined up with the rest of us who were jersey-clad, but then looked over at the photographer, ya know, the guy with the huge camera around his neck, and said, "Oh! Are you gonna take our picture?" She was not kidding. Wilma is entertaining.

Actually, teller#9 is more often the entertainment, in a much different way. He's catching on much quicker than any of the rest of us, but his social manner is sometimes hard to interpret. One day, just out of the blue, he asked our instructor if she dyed her hair. When he speaks to me, and I answer him, he just stares at me. He speaks in a monotone, doesn't take notes, doesn't highlight anything, and I suspect that he doesn't study, either. He is old and young at the same time. Chronologically, he's quite young.

Wednesday, Feb 6--

Update: Lily has disappeared: And then there were nine.

I should be studying, and I am, really--just taking a break....the test is Friday, but I won't have as much time tomorrow to pour over this stuff. My eyes are tired.

Feb 8--last test. It wasn't hard, but I did make a couple stupid booboos. That's all right, I wound up with the same score as last time. The tests are not the part of this that's challenging. Oh, and Beamer didn't show up for the test. She went through almost two weeks of this, and just walked off.

After the test, it was another day of class. Another woman from the security department came in with a collection of bad checks, and had lots of stories about people who keep falling for the same fraudulent/scam crap we've all heard about: "I'll mail you a check for $30,000, and all you gotta do is deposit it and wire me the money!" The saddest ones are the dating scams, when the poor schmuck isn't looking to make money, but just wants this nice woman from some poor country to have the money to fly here and be his Valentine. Security Woman said she had a long conversation with one man who walked into one of the branches with a fraudulent check who had a sob story about his "girlfriend" and he was so totally convinced about her story that Security could not reason with him at all and decided to simply close his account. Of course the bank could have simply refused the check, but Security felt that he was a risk to the bank, since he might try something like this again and he certainly would not be able to cover the cost of the check after it bounced.

Since it was Friday, and people kept dozing off, Instructor handed out little packets of Starbursts. Teller#9 kept asking people to trade colors with him, since his will only eat the pink ones. He's such a trip.

We have to go back in for about half a day on Monday to make up time we lost the first week. Then the training will sort of start all over again....

14 comments:

Doug said...

Oh, hallelujah for the return of evocative pseudonyms in work stories. Are you sure no one's eating your colleagues? Teller #9 sounds like a maybe cannibal.

dddragon said...

I hope that you like the people at the branch that you end up at (which is where?). I really like my co-workers - what a relief to LIKE where I work!!

Jon Cox said...

Ohh WOW!! CrAzY Scams!! Good luck on Monday.

Jocelyn said...

Lawsy. You just took me into a whole 'nuther world. And that's what I love!

ariel said...

Like in that Agatha Christie crime story, Ten Little Niggers. I am glad the funny training buddies are left.

TLP said...

Oh how I love your work stories!

Your mother is proud of your 99's.

Kyahgirl said...

you're kind of a smarty pants aren't ya?! good job.

I'm looking forward to more work stories, suitably cloaked in mystery of course, to protect the innocent :-)

Tom & Icy said...

Great characterizations, funny. And then comes Doug.

OldHorsetailSnake said...

Somebody once told me banking was a dull job. Must be true.

tsduff said...

When I worked in security at a small bank, which was then swallowed alive by the antichrist biggest bank in the world, I lost my faith in banks. The fraud department will never win, banks will still steal your hard earned money hand-over-fist with all their bank account mumbo-jumbo about this account and that account making more interest... can you tell I'm a little bit bitter? My job was lost on the chopping block a year after the "swallowing" occurred. Now, after that rant, I do truly hope things have changed and that you manage to enjoy your stay. (Instead of starbursts, I got suckers at my training)...

Balou said...

I'm waiting with baited breath for the rest of the story! Teller #9 sounds like one strange duck. Like the person the TV interviewers talk to after the crime, "He was quiet and kept to himself, only ate pink Starbursts and stared a lot." ;)

AP3 said...

Thank goodness you always manage to work with quirky people!

G said...

I'm betting on Teller #9 to be head teller - quick to catch on and socially awkward (from my branch banking experience :)

Continued good luck!

Bone said...

This reminds me of a training class I went thru for one particular job. We had 12, as well. One lady dropped out, saying she was going back to driving a truck for a living.

Then a couple got let go because they weren't catching on quickly enough.

But the nine of us that were left always sort of had this bond.

Sounds like you're doing well. And it's always good to have a Wilma around :)